Needing focus...
18:54 Posted In life Edit This 2 Comments »Some days I think I have way too many interests.
I love several aspects of visual art from painting to printmaking to photography to collage to drawing.
I love drawing in henna and the connection that comes with adorning other people.
Belly dance gets me going on a few different levels from costuming to the mental and physical challenges to the beauty in the dance itself.
I genuinely enjoy and acknowledge the importance of physical exercise. This can take the form of yoga, swimming or even weight training at the gym.
Delicious food and testing different recipes in the kitchen is a must! Food is far more than something to be shoved into the stomach before carrying on.
I have always loved reading and I come from a family where reading is a much loved way to enjoy oneself and relax. With my mom working in the library, anything even remotely interesting was brought home to be investigated.
Sadly it has been far too long since I have enjoyed much time outdoors in the mountains. I have no excuse really, I have always loved hiking and camping. There is a sense of vibrancy that I simply do not find in the city.
And of course, there are the fun times spent with those important people in my life - I simply can't go without that! :)
But I have to work, to pay the bills and afford the ingredients in the aforementioned pursuits (food, art supplies, gas for travel etc). I have to sleep to avoid collapsing in a sickened weary state. So this leaves me with only so much time to take part in those activities that bring me so much joy.
I look around and see items unfinished, ideas for projects or pastimes not even started and I get frustrated. How can I squeeze more time in? I wonder if I can ever do really well at anything when my energies seem so scattered? Then there is also the occasional paralysis of having so many choices I can't decide what to do and then nothing gets done. It's depressing. Really.
I think I need to prioritize or pare things down somehow. Maybe that way I will be able to more fully explore various projects. So how do I do that without feeling that horrible "what if" feeling? How do I let something go without feeling like I'm losing out or short changing myself?